Crushing Clams : Guide to Lesbian Etiquette

Eye Candy Thursday

Hello again, Kids & Kittens…

Before we get to the meat of today’s post (hot, hot women) a few things to address.

Michael Jackson has died at the age of 50.  TB & I have been keeping an eye on this story for several hours as media reports varied between deceased and coma/life support.  However, the King of Pop suffered cardiac arrest at his home in LA at the age of 50 and has been pronounced dead.  For you kids who are unfamiliar, Michael began his musical career in 1967.  He would later go on to a vastly successful solo career spanning decades.  While I thought Michael was, to say the least, an odd duck, his music was fantastic.  His greatest hits CD’s is one of my all time favourite albums to jam to.   RIP Michael Joseph Jackson.  The world has lost a phenominal artist.

Watch videos here:  Michael’s Official YouTube Channel

Another death to announce today…Farrah Fawcett lost her battle with cancer today, she was 62.  Farrah gained her fame when she appeared as Jill Munroe on Charlie’s Angels in 1976.  She was a hair-icon in the 70’s and 80’s and her poster sales broke records, making her an international sex symbol for nearly 2 decades.  RIP Farrah Fawcett.

Farrah FawcettFarrah

Onwards and upwards!  Modern day eye candy coming your way!


Alyson Hannigan

Alyson HanniganShe’s more cute than hot. (Gaynip sez:  Again with the Buffy girls?)

Michelle Morgan

MichelleAppears on CBC’s “Heartland” and has been in 2 episodes of “Stargate: Atlantis”.

Annette Blyckert/Annette Olzon

Annette BlyckertFrontwoman of the Finnish symphonic power metal band “Nightwish” and was the formerly the female vocalist of “Alyson Avenue”.


Kat Von Dee

KatVonDeeFemale tattoo artist extrodinaire!  Normally, I wouldn’t like this many tattoo’s on anyone (and I wouldn’t normally say this) but they suit her.  I like the ones she has on her face, the tiny stars.  Not to mention, she’s got a hot voice.

Katee Sackhoff

Katee SackhoffFrom Battlestar Galatica, Starbuck.  Not the photo of Katee I wanted to use…but for some reason WordPress is being a crab about posting it.  Still, kinda hot.

Kiyomi McCloskey

Kiyomi McCloskySo TB was being all high and mighty (but not because she was high AND mighty) about picking random “famous” hot chicks.  I thereby submit for your approval, Kiyomi McCloskey, the lead singer/guitarist for the band “Hunter Valentine”.  I suggest checking out their singleStaten Island Dream Tour(the revised/radio friendly lyrics).


Eye Candy Thursdays

Kids & Kittens,

We are so sorry about being remiss in our posting duties.  Thunderbush has been sick (let’s all shake a common fist at allergy related illness) and I’d like to tell you that I’ve been busy with some hugely important task (like starting a harem) but alas I’ve just been lazy.

So to make it up to you, we are instituting “Eye Candy Thursdays”!  Pretty self explanitory, right?  Right.  Each week, TB & I will compile a list of ladies for you to oggle.  Feel free to submit yours to us by e-mail (minus the spaces, obviously):

crushingclams @ gmail . com

Without further adieu!

Thunderbush’s Picks:

Eliza Dushku

Eliza(This isn’t the exact picture TB showed me but I lost it…so to make up for it…suggestive nudity!) Best know to most of us as Faith from Buffy The Vampire Slayer (Although I loved her in Tru Calling!)

Kat Denning

Kat Denning

Amber Benson

Amber BensonI only really like Amber in the musical episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Gaynip’s Picks:

Lauren Lee Smith

Lauren Lee SmithMost notably know to most as “The Soup Chef” Lara Perkins, this is actual a still shot from the movie Pathology.  She’s evil and tres sexy.  Bad girls get me every time.

Julie Benz

Julie BenzWhat is with today’s post and Buffy characters?  Julie played Darla for 6 episodes and 20 episodes of Angel.  She’s also in Dexter (SO excited for season 4!) but her character is a little meek for my liking.

Melanie Chisholm

Melanie CWHAT?  Haha…let me start by saying, that Melanie Chisholm, aka Melanie C aka Sporty Spice was my very first gay crush.  I was 14ish at the time, no idea I was gay, but thought she was the most beautiful woman I’d ever laid eyes on.  Now that we’re both grown up and given up Adidas snap pants (…don’t say a word) she’s only gotten hotter.  Must be the tats while still looking rather girlish.

There you have it!  Our first ever installment of “Eye Candy Thursdays”.  So, while we can’t always promise regular intelligent postings or stories, we’ll promise that once a week there will be at least ONE piece of eye candy to sustain you.

KRXQ Slams Transgender Kids

Hey there kids and kittens!

Gaynip here with a serious axe to grind about a story out of Sacramento that makes my blood simmer in my veins even as I have had a few days to marinade on the topic. I’m not sure which part of me is angrier, the lesbian or the radio broadcaster. Actually, scratch that. The radio broadcaster part is angrier by leaps and bounds.

The story is out of Sacramento California, specifically KRXQ 98.5 FM “Rob, Arnie and Dawn in the Morning” (also in syndication in Reno, Nevada on KDOT 104.5 FM) which aired May 28th. You can listen to a half hour skim of the show in question here:

Let me just summarize that the segment or “bit” as we call it in the biz starts off discussing an Omaha, Nebraska story about a set of parents who support their daughters wishes for a transition. The whole situation deteriorates from there with “jokes” about child abuse and defamatory comments about transgendered children.

Here are a couple of excerpts from the show:

“If my son, God forbid, if my son put on a pair of high heels, I would probably hit him with one of my shoes. I would throw a shoe at him. Because you know what? Boys don’t wear high heels. And in my house, they definitely don’t wear high heels.”-Arnie

You know, my favorite part about hearing these stories about the kids in high school, who the entire high school caters around, lets the boy wear the dress. I look forward to when they go out into society and society beats them down. And they end up in therapy.”-Arnie

“Dawn, they are freaks. They are abnormal. Not because they’re girls trapped in boys bodies but because they have a mental disorder that needs to be somehow gotten out of them. That’s where therapy could help them.”-Rob

I will applaud the efforts of Dawn, who during the entire segment did her best (often yelling over the ignorant comments of her co-hosts) to defend the transgendered community. She didn’t have a whole lot of information on the subject, but I should point out that when radio hosts discuss items, they generally don’t go into serious research (talk radio shows/formats the exception) on a topic. Dawn was probably told “At 11:50 we’re going to talk about this story” and each of them will have a point or two to offer up on the subject. I’m sure Dawn didn’t think that the topic would be that explosive or run for that long. I think, given her limited information, she did her best.

GLAAD was made aware of the situation by a follower of their blog ( and the story took off from there. They put out a call to action, and people sent letters, e-mails and phone calls. 11 sponsors have pulled their advertising dollars since the comments aired:

  • Chipotle
  • Snapple
  • Sonic
  • Bank of America
  • Verizon
  • Carl’s Jr (CKE Restaurants)
  • Wells Fargo
  • Nissan North America
  • AT&T
  • McDonald’s
  • Guitar Center

As a radio announcer, I understand the concept of ratings, especially in large markets (like Sacramento and Reno) and how a morning show constantly has to push themselves to be hip, fresh and edgy to beat out the competition. Radio announcers also inject their shows with their own thoughts, opinions and some biased editorials. That’s what makes us “personalities”, otherwise it would be a series of songs/commercials on auto pilot. It’s what gets us fans and a listenership. That having been said, as a broadcaster it is in our best interest to serve our communities to the best of our efforts and not abuse the power we are given. A microphone is a powerful tool, but like anything it can be abused (remember Don Imus?)

There will always be misinformed or ignorant people who don’t believe in being transgendered. There will always be people who consider it some kind of deviation (one of the guys compared this to “animal love” or bestiality). If you’re going to take the other side of an argument on any issue (especially sensitive ones like this) it should be better researched, well informed and intelligent. No name calling, no mention of violence and don’t open the phone lines to the ignorant (they had to censor a call) and give them a soapbox to shout upon.

The morning show has met with GLAAD, they have a retraction on their website ( and they plan to air a special show on Thursday morning (7:30AM pst) where the hosts will issue an apology and phone lines will be open (A note: If you plan to call in, please remember to be civil. No need to stoop).

Frankly, I don’t think these two actually feel any remorse for their harsh words. They aren’t going to simply change their minds when they clearly feel so strongly about this topic. GLAAD has apparently suggested “transgender media training” which would be completely appropriate for the situation. It will be interesting to see if the apology will be enough to sooth advertisers into spending with the station again.

What you can do:

Contact KRXQ and let them know how you feel on the issue (Again, TB & I stress being respectful and civil) and demand that Arnie and Rob be held accountable for their comments and establish some standards when it comes to using their media platform for condoning or promoting hatred or violence against anyone.

John Geary
Vice President & General Manager
(916) 339-4209

Arnie States
On Air Personality
(916) 334-7777

Rob Williams
On Air Personality
(916) 334-7777

I agree with the statement on the “Rob, Arnie and Dawn in the Morning” website. They have failed on all levels.  They should be ashamed, not as broadcasters but has human beings.  I look forward to the show tomorrow morning.

Oh My God, I’m Gay!

Hey there kids and kittens! Thunderbush and Gaynip here for your first installment of Crushing Clams your guide to all things gay. You might be asking yourselves, “What made you guys decide to write a gay blog?”, and it’s funny you should ask (and if you didn’t, too bad we’re going to tell you). Thunderbush and I woke up in a jail cell after a night of drunken debauchery (is there any other kind?) and the judge said it was either write a blog to educate the world about all things gay/lesbian or… we could go to jail. TB was all set to go to jail, but I wasn’t too keen on becoming Bertha’s bitch. So we opted for the blog.

Okay, so that’s not exactly true. The real answer (far less glamorous or funny) is that we have a lot of free time on our hands. Thunderbush and I are kind of polar opposites on the lesbian scale. Kinda like Donnie and Marie, she’s a little bit rock & roll and I’m a little bit country. Only there’s no incest. And we’re a helluvalot gayer, which, in retrospect is pretty damn gay. Joking aside, TB has been out for about 2 years now and I’ve just come out. I live in a small town and TB lives in the big city. It’s not hard to tell I’m gay (c’mon, a chick in a tie…) and TB often gets mistaken for being straight (it’s the purses…not so gay, TB). We thought the differences would offer up a unique perspective on how it all comes together. We both sat down at the big gay drawing board (which looks suspiciously like a regular drawing board) and wondered what our first blog should be about. After much discussion, alcohol and procrastination, the topic we chose was: “Oh my God, I’m Gay!”


When I was in high school, my “friends” used to call me a dyke and a lesbian on a daily basis. It didn’t matter what I did, when they wanted to make fun of me, that’s where the jokes would ultimately go. It made me angry and it also made me wonder if I was missing something. My parents had me convinced that it was just “kids being kids” (read: cruel). I could never keep a boyfriend. Not to say the guys didn’t like me, quite the contrary, but once they started to get too close (or want more than kissing) I would break up with them. I told my friends I didn’t want to have sex, and that my parents raised me to wait.  

At the tail end of my first year in college I met a girl; we’ll call her Norma Bates (because, well, she turned out to be a psycho). I won’t get into the details of the “relationship” (for lack of a better term) but when I left home for the month for an internship, Norma called my house. She knew I wasn’t home but felt the need to check up on me. My parents became suspicious and asked my sister what she knew of my friend Norma. My sister, who was always looking for ways to get me into hot water (and had so far been unsuccessful), told them that Norma and I were more than just friends. Shortly thereafter, my Dad called me up and asked me point blank if I was a lesbian. The question took me aback and honestly, I’d never even thought of it like that. He insisted I promise him I wasn’t gay (what can I say, he’s truly homophobic) and because I loved him, I promised. We never spoke of Norma again.

Fast forward to February of this year, I had just come home from running errands and was putting everything away and sort of talking to myself (because I’m mentally stable, right?  …RIGHT?). I don’t even remember what about, but I said “It’s not like I’m gay or anything” and I caught my reflection in the bathroom mirror as I shut the medicine cabinet. I felt so sad all of a sudden, very much like someone who’d just been caught in a weighty lie. I broke down, I couldn’t hand it, and the very idea that I was gay scared the hell out of me.


Coming from a small town, I never really thought of “gay” or “lesbian” at all. Being a high school bookworm- I wasn’t exactly part of the socialite crowd, so dating was never an issue. I think I had a boyfriend for all of half an hour? With college came a string of short-term boyfriends and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why the sex was always boring (I had sex while watching TV to stay distracted!), or why the breakups were never hard. Then it happened…My first kiss with a girl… BING! LIGHTBULB!I tried to tell myself it only turned me on “because guys were watching” and proceeded to try and laugh it off, even though I knew something felt more right about kissing her than anything else ever had. It was welcome to the years of denial.

Fast forward another year, I met my soon to be fiancé at 19. He loved me and I thought my girl kissing was just a phase. I was going to get married, have kids and BE NORMAL!! This lasted all of seven months and I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. I broke things off with “boy” and finally had the courage to date a girl. I was lucky she was absolutely wonderful and even though we didn’t last, she ended up being one of my best friends. I never looked back. In all honesty, I was relieved that I could finally admit to myself that I was a lesbian.


Ultimately, the stories vary from person to person. Some people have known their whole lives, some people figure it out late in life (it’s quite the “in thing” for women in their late 30’s/early 40’s to come out) or never at all (we’ve all met that person we swear to God is gay). When you get right down to it, it’s about being true to yourself, and like the song says:


Some days you gotta dance,

Live it up when you get the chance

cause when the world doesnt make no sense

And youre feeling just a little to tense

Gotta loosen up those chains and dance -Dixie Chicks


Whether you’re straight, gay, bi, trans or fall somewhere else on the sexual colour spectrum, be yourself.